I love cheese, but its plain to see
That cheese, doesn't love me
I am such a fool in love
I just cannot get enough
But it's an unrequited love
I can feel it in my guts

I spend the nights, tossing and turning
My stomach is churning
My heart is a-burning
My nightmares are turning upon me and shame me
To drive me insane, oh the pain, [bad word] on my brain
And I wake up, with sweat on my brow
I know I gotta give it up and I must do it now
But instead in the morning when my wife is gone 
I find myself back on [bad word] 
And I know that it's wrong but I'm soon navigating
To real mature stuff and [bad word] old ladies
Feeding my fetish for fettered old fetta
Photos of friesian on beds of [bad word] The more they smell the more they swing
The faster the speed my mouth gets wet oh god 

Oh god

Je dois le fromage? (I can't make out most of the French)

'Cept perhaps last night's post mid night double cream brie
Trying to replace my fon-do's with fon-don'ts
Trying to develop strength of will, but I know that I won't
I have found love is never fair
We should be such a marvellous pair
But each time I bring her home she goes, renders [bad word] Leaves me with self loathing slumped on my chair

I cannot camen-bear it anymore
[bad word] you ?
Everytime I lead you through the door
I end up curled up on the floor
Oh god my poor heart is too sore, so no more

But before I give you up, I just need one more tiny taste
To leave you like this, would be a criminal waste
Just one more tiny taste, darling please
Just one more little slither of C-H-E-E-S-Cheese

Cheese

Cheese, cheese, cheese
Cheese