You've got an invalid haircut 
It hurts when you smile 
You'd better get out of town 
Before your nickname expires 
It's the kingdom of the spiders 
It's the empire of the ants 
You need a permit to walk around downtown 
You need a license to dance 

Life'll kill ya 
That's what I said 
Life'll kill ya 
Then you'll be dead 
Life'll find ya 
Wherever you go 
Requiescat in pace 
That's all she wrote 

From the President of the United States 
To the lowliest rock and roll star 
The doctor is in and he'll see you now 
He don't care who you are 
Some get the awful, awful diseases 
Some get the knife, some get the gun 
Some get to die in their sleep 
At the age of a hundred and one 

Life'll kill ya 
That's what I said 
Life'll kill ya 
Then you'll be dead 
Life'll find ya 
Wherever you go 
Requiescat in pace 
That's all she wrote 

Maybe you'll go to heaven 
See Uncle Al and Uncle Lou 
Maybe you'll be reincarnated 
Maybe that stuff's [bad word] 
If you were good 
Maybe [bad word] back as someone nice 
And if you were bad 
Maybe you'll have to pay the price 

Life'll kill ya 
That's what I said 
Life'll kill ya 
Then you'll be dead 
Life'll find ya 
Wherever you go 
Requiescat in pace 
That's all she wrote