Remember when you ran away
And I got on my knees
And begged you not to leave
Because I'd go berserk?

You left me anyhow
And then the days got worse and worse
And now you see I've [bad word] out of my mind
And. . .
 [bad word] to take me away, HA HA [bad word] to take me away, HO HO HEE HEE HA HA
To the funny farm
Where life is beautiful all the time
And I'll be happy to see
Those nice, young men
In their clean, white coats
And [bad word] to take me away, Ha-haaa!
 [bad word] to take me away, HA HA [bad word] to take me away, HO HO HEE HEE HA HA
To the funny farm
Where life is beautiful all the time
And I'll be happy to see
Those nice, young men
In their clean, white coats
And [bad word] to take me away, Ha-haaa!

You thought it was a joke
And so you laughed
You laughed when I had said
That losing you would make me flip my lid
Right. . .

You know you laughed, I heard you laughed
You laughed, you laughed and laughed
And then you left
But now you know I'm utterly mad!
And. . .
(And)
 [bad word] to take me away, HA HA [bad word] to take me away, HO HO HEE HEE HA HA
To the funny farm
Where life is beautiful all the time
And I'll be happy to see
Those nice, young men
In their clean, white coats
And [bad word] to take me away, Ha-haaa!
 [bad word] to take me away, HA HA [bad word] to take me away, HO HO HEE HEE HA HA
To the happy home
With trees and flowers and chirping birds
And basket weavers who sit and smile
And twiddle their thumbs and toes
And [bad word] to take me away, Ha-haaa!

I cooked your food
I cleaned your house
And this is how you pay me back
For all my kind, unselfish loving deeds?!!
Hah. . .

Well you just wait
They'll find you yet
And when they do they'll
Put you in the ASPCA, you mangy mutt!
(And). . .
 [bad word] to take me away, HA HA [bad word] to take me away, HO HO HEE HEE HA HA
To the funny farm
Where life is beautiful all the time
And I'll be happy to see
Those nice, young men
In their clean, white coats
And [bad word] to take me away, Ha-haaa!
 [bad word] to take me away, HA HA [bad word] to take me away, HO HO

To the happy home
With trees and flowers and chirping birds
And basket weavers who sit and smile
And twiddle their thumbs and toes
And [bad word] to take me away, Ha-haaa!

Take me away [bad word] to take me away)