I once had a girl,
 Or should I say 
 She once had me; 
 She showed me her room, 
 Isn't it good 
 Norwegian wood. 
 She asked me to stay and she told me to sit anywhere, 
 So I looked around and I noticed there wasn't a chair, 

I sat on [bad word]  
 Biding my time, 
 Drinking her wine. 
 We talked until two 
 And then she said, 
 "it's time for bed." 
 She told me she worked in the morning and started to laugh, 
 I told her I didn't and crawled off to sleep in the bath. 

And when I awoke 
 I was alone, 
 This bird had flown. 
 So I lit a fire, 
 Isn't it good 
 Norwegian wood.