What a surpriser
Open your eyes, a
Woman advisor

The name of this entertainement is
Women lose weight
Our first years of mariage everything was just great
But after two kids
And a weight gain factor
The fact is
Now [bad word] unattractive
Look fat chicks
I dont mean to [bad word] I tell her nice hit the gym
And dont eat so much food
But no

Your shallow
You need [bad word] the course of unconditionnal love and so forth

But how if desires is not there
Thats just delayment
Divorce is, child support, alimony payments
My happiness I doubt discouraged
So hurry for an easier way out of this marriage
Meanwhile my secretary june well groomed
When you gonna leave your wife
I tell her soon mommy soon I assume
Or my destiny is blue
Interestingly
The only thing left for me to do is to kill her

What a surpriser
Open your eyes, a
Woman advisor

Im gonna have to kill her

Of course theres laws which enforces divorces

Send that [bad word] right to the morgue miss

My plans against or shenanigans
Kinda ran thin
Knowin nothing about poisoning
And I cant swim
Bad intentions pumping
Might as well [bad word] numb
Cut her lungs or the obvious robbery gone wrong
But the catch is do I have the nerve to dispatch this
Who can I get to help me murder this fat chick
I guess Ill have to play a dude robbin on wednesday
The day she usually goes food shopping
Anyway long story short hit the side of her chrysler
And sent her clean over the divider
You [bad word] she said as the wreck went tumblin down the hill
I thought she has to be dead
Later on get a call
(from a) lieutenant orourke
(had me) leapin like a frog
We need you at the morgue
So I selfishly persue
Boohoo there was nothing else for me to do I had to kill her

What a surpriser
Open your eyes, a
Woman advisor

Cmon yall know I had to kill her

Of course theres laws which enforces divorces

Send that [bad word] right to the morgue miss
Kill her

What a surpriser
Open your eyes, a
Woman advisor

Cmon yall know I had to kill her

Of course theres laws which enforces divorces

Send that [bad word] right to the morgue miss

So you mean to tell me officer you dont have no clue who did this hit [bad word] No sir we dont have no clues right now
This is terrible what am I gonna tell the kids?
Pull yourself together sir
Im so broken up inside I just cant believe this
I understand, I understand
Catch the person who did this
Were gonna try sir
Please

Screamin who done took my heart acting shakin up a lot
At the funeral though everyone was lookin at me odd like I did it
Like I was the reason my mates slain murmuring
I heard he was displeased with her weight gain
While my secretary sort of a y blonde cant cook
All she does is order from restaurants
All of the  you want
I doubt could adress, clothes not washed proper and house look a mess and
Talkin to detectives that was waitin outside
How I took a long lunch break day the wife died
I darn near turned pale
And because of betrayal they indicted me, and gave me an impossible bail
Good fortune to anyone admiring the rawtent
Moral of the story is
Desire is important
So watch your weight
Itll keep you mate smitten its a given
Though looking back I realised I didnt have to kill her

What a surpriser
Open your eyes, a
Woman advisor

I didnt have to kill her

Of course theres laws which enforces divorces

Send that [bad word] right to the morgue miss
I killed her

What a surpriser
Open your eyes, a
Woman advisor

I didnt have to kill her

Of course theres laws which enforces divorces

Send that [bad word] right to the morgue miss

Well there you have it
Keep thin trim
Keep your mariage healthy
Do you know what I mean?
Small message from morcheeba and slick rick [bad word] 
Peace