I hurt myself today
to see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
the only thing that's real
the needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but I remember everything

what have I [bad word] 
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end
you could have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of [bad word] upon my liar's chair
full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
beneath the stain of time
the feeling disappears
you are someone else
I am still right here

what have I [bad word] 
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end
you could have it all
my empire or dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

if I could start again
a million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way