Christmas, Christmas time is here
And Christmas songs you love to hear.
Thoughts of joy and hope and cheer
But mostly shopping, shopping, shopping!

Christmas, Christmas time is here
The sleigh bells and the red nose deer.
Song and songs we love to hear
All played a thousand times each year.

Heard this same song twenty times
And it’s only Halloween!

(Joy To The World)

(I saw three [bad word] sailing in on Christmas Day on Christmas Day)

Christmas, Christmas time is here
(Hark The Herald Angels Sing)
And Christmas songs you love to hear
(Joy To The World)
Thoughts of joy and hope and cheer
But mostly shopping, shopping, shopping!

Christmas season, starting sooner every year!
It’s October!
Stores with plastic Christmas trees!
Ransack the mall!
Shopping till you loose your mind!
Spike the eggnog!
Sit back and [bad word]  Frosty, Tiny Tim, and Scrooge, the Grinch or Charlie Brown
It’s time!
(hey)

It’s time to do the Christmas Can-Can
If you can’t can’t dance
Well that’s’ ok!
Not going to do the kick line!

All you need is a tree, some lights
presents wrap them up and pray for snow!
(Ho!) [bad word] to your closet,
Find your Christmas sweater,
Screaming carols all the way!
(fa la la la la la)

Maine all the way to California,
It’s the Christmas Can-Can,
Halloween to Christmas Day!

It’s the most wonderful time of year, [bad word] mad with Christmas cheer!
(Hey what’s the trouble with you my friend?)
It’s not fair if you’re Jewish, Jewish.
Not fair if you’re Jewish, Jewish.

Dradle, dradle dradle
I made it out of clay!
You realize that Christmas ain’t the only holiday!
(oy)

Hey he’s right, who made these laws?
Look! Wait [bad word] Santa Claus!
Santa Claus! Santa Claus! Santa Claus! Santa Claus!
Santa, Santa, Santa, Santa,
Santa, Santa, Santa, Santa!
GUYS!

Hey Santa do the can-can,
Help them if you can-can,
Join in the parade!
(I’m gonna go grab some Chinese food.)

All you need is tree, some lights, about a thousand
presents wrap them up and pray for snow!
(Ho!) [bad word] to your closet,
Find your Christmas sweater,
Screaming carols all the way!
(fa la la la la la)

France all the way to Indiana,
It’s the Christmas Can-Can,
That’s the end!
WAIT!

For our ending we should share this holiday
hava nagila…Happy Hanukkah to you,
a happy Hanukkah to you,
a happy Hanukkah to you,
Merry Christmas, Hanukkah,
and also Kwanzaa!

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah
And Merry Kwanzaa too!
(ho)