It's a happy new year
I'm making guacamole
You couldn't even pick up the [bad word] phone and call me

I don't like my t-shirt
I don't like my blue jeans
I don't like my attitude, but it's gonna be a party

Whoa-oh
Let's party

It's a happy new year
Last year was so stupid
Most of us were [bad word] and even more of us were puking

Though I heard [bad word] -
Something about bad shrimp?
Don't know how I made it up the stairs to your apartment

Whoa-oh
I remember it
Whoa-oh
Climbing up to bed
Whoa-oh
I remember it
I remember it

And that's not all that I'm forgetting
It's a new year, the last one's ending
Don't know how I ever made it out
Here's to nothing ever changing
If it were, then I'd be parting ways
With all the bad habits I found
But I'll still hang around
I'll still hang around
I'll still hang around
I'll still hang around

It's a happy new year
I'm eating guacamole
You kissed me at midnight 'cause you thought that I looked lonely

I don't like my outfit
I guess it's not important
'Cause I like your four-track and the things you record on it

It's the time of year now
To keep your close friends closest
We'll be friends forever and I don't care if you know it

It's a happy new year
Unlike all the rest
Feels like I am changing and I know it's for the best

Whoa-oh
I remember that
Whoa-oh
Climbing up to bed
Whoa-oh
I remember that
I remember that

And that's not all that I'm pretending
It's a new year, the last one's ending
And all the guacamole I made browned.
Here's to always ever-changing
Circumstances we're arranging
Throwing all our cautions to the ground
They only weigh you down
I won't let you down
I won't let you down
I won't let you down

Hey, did you know you can check the time
Your call reaches the other line?
Hey, did you know that I know you lied?
So board it up and don't even try
Last year is ending just in time.

I got out alive
I got out alive
I got out alive

It's a happy new year
Here I am again
Writing in my car, and this time I can't pretend that we are friends

We're not friends
Friends don't do the things we did
And the ones you've done since then makes think we've never been

When is this night gonna end?
Are you lying in her bed?
All these questions hit my head
Hey where's the whiskey at again

You were [bad word] 
When you showed up at my door
Leaving glitter on my floor
But I don't like you anymore

No, I don't like you anymore
No, I don't like you anymore
No, I don't like you anymore
No, I don't like you anymore

No, I don't like you anymore
No, I don't like you anymore
No, I don't like you anymore
No, I don't like you anymore