Now then Mardy Bum 
I see your frown 
And it's like looking down the barrel of a gun 
And it goes off 
And [bad word] all these words 
Oh there's a very pleasant side to you 
side I much prefer 

It's one that laughs and jokes around 
Remember cuddles in the kitchen 
Yeah, to get things off the ground 
And it was up, up and away 
Oh, but it's right hard to remember 
That on a day like today when you're all argumentative 
And you've got the face on 

Well now then Mardy Bum 
Oh I'm in trouble again, aren't I? 
I thought as much 
Cause you turned over there 
Pulling that silent disappointment face 
The one that I can't bear 

Can't we laugh and joke around 
Remember cuddles in the kitchen 
Yeah, to get things off the ground 
And it was up, up and away 
Oh, but it's right hard to remember 
That on a day like today when you're all argumentative 
And you've got the face on 

Yeah I'm sorry I was late 
Well I missed the train 
And then the traffic was a state 
And I can't be [bad word] to carry on in this debate 
That reoccurs, oh when you say I don't care 
Well of course I do, yeah I clearly do! 

So laugh and joke around 
Remember cuddles in the kitchen 
Yeah, to get things off the ground 
And it was up, up and away 
Still it's right hard to remember 
That on a day like today when you're all argumentative 
And you've got the face on