We got another pub anthem
This song right here, is about makin out with somebody
And never talkin to them again [laughter]
And basically, how jealousy is a weak emotion.
And how [bad word] the world. (That's right)
Make out with the universe now

I wanna walk into a bar, find myself a girl
Introduce myself, tell her that I like her shoes
Tell her she can buy her own drinks
I pull her to a dark corner, kiss her and make her heart sink
It's funny when the thugs with the tattoos think
That I'm a nerdy [bad word] first base classroom geek
They walk by me and they don't even speak (word)
Then they find their girlfriend propped up on the bathroom sink
She's kissing me
We feelin the rhythm of slow [bad word] givin delicate kisses with little to no tongue
It's so fun
She happily will follow the mirage
She's warm like a bottle of Shiraz  [bad word] 
There's something so especially unique about a girl that thinks her boyfriend's jealousy is weak
So right before he punches me and breaks my nose
I touch her whole entire body with the makeout rows

 [bad word] 
Cause I'm a makeout bandit
If you don't understand it
Keep your little love thing away from me
Cause I'm a makeout bandit
If you don't understand it
Keep your one night stand away from me
Cause I'm a makeout bandit
If you don't understand it
Keep your [bad word] jealousy away from me
Cause I'm a makeout bandit
If you don't understand it
You should probably stay away from me

She wants to walk into a bar, find herself a boy
Introduce herself, tell him that she likes his ink
Tell him she can buy her own drinks
Pull him to a dark corner, bite his neck and make his heart sink
Play the harp strings in him, feel the sharp sting lightly
She got a sweet burn like a Long Beach ice tea
He feels flattered, he feels like such a bachelor
He asks for her name, but she says it doesn't matter
Like "Listen up boy, you're not my boo you're not my king
Don't say another word you're [bad word] everything
I'm just choosin every dream that I've had with my flavor"
She's a humanitarian, she's not a player  [bad word] 
She doesn't drink til she [bad word] 
Therefore she doesn't wake up next to random body skin
And she'll keep every bobby pin, bracelet, and necklace
Tells him you will not regret this

 [bad word] 

You gotta put away the jealousy and drama, let it go (let it go)
You gotta put away the guns in your rap songs, let 'em go (let 'em go)
You gotta swallow that weak [bad word] anger, let it go (let it go)
You gotta stop takin life so serious and let it go
(make out with the universe)

I wanna walk into a venue, find myself Bjork
Introduce myself, tell her that I like her music
Ask her if she'll purchase me a car
Take her outside then I'll kiss her underneath the bright stars
From shiny Mission West back to Raytown High
I had to serenade my baby with the K-town vibe
I hit the switches on the tre pound five
And make Icelandic love on the playground slide
Cause I'm the makeout guy