SOLO (spoken):
Macavity!

MUNGOJERRIE:
Mungojerrie [bad word]  [bad word] 
BOTH:
We're a notorious couple of cats
As knockabout clowns, quick [bad word] Tight-rope walkers and acrobats [bad word] 
We have an extensive reputation

MUNGOJERRIE:
We make our home in Victoria Grove

BOTH:
That is merely our center of operation
For we are incurably given to rove [bad word] 
We are very well known in Cornwall Gardens

MUNGOJERRIE:
In Launceston Place [bad word] 
And in Kensington Square

BOTH:
We have really a little more reputation
Than a couple of cats can very well bear [bad word] 
If the area window is found ajar

MUNGOJERRIE:
Or the basement looks like a field of war
If a tile or [bad word] loose on the roof [bad word] 
Which presently fails to be waterproof

BOTH:
If the drawers are pulled out from bedroom chests
And you can't find one of your winter vests [bad word] 
If after supper one of the girls
Suddenly misses her Woolworth pearls

BOTH:
Then the family will say, "It's that horrible cat!

MUNGOJERRIE:
"It was Mungojerrie [bad word]  [bad word] "

BOTH:
And most of the time they leave it at that

BOTH:
Mungojerrie [bad word] have a very unusual gift of the gab

MUNGOJERRIE:
We are highly efficient cat burglars as well [bad word] 
And remarkably smart at the smash and grab
We make our home in Victoria Grove

MUNGOJERRIE:
We have no regular occupation

BOTH:
We are plausible fellows who like to engage
friendly policeman in conversation

When the family assembles for Sunday dinner
Their minds made up that they won't get thinner

MUNGOJERRIE:
On Argentine joint, [bad word] 
Potatoes and greens

BOTH:
Then the cook will appear from behind the scenes

MUNGOJERRIE:
And say in a voice that is broken with sorrow [bad word] 
"I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tomorrow
For the joint has gone from the oven like that!"

BOTH:
Then the family will say, "It's that horrible cat!

MUNGOJERRIE:
"It was Mungojerrie [bad word]  [bad word] "

BOTH:
And most of the time they leave it at that

BOTH:
Mungojerrie [bad word] have a wonderful way
Of working together [bad word] 
And some of the time you would say it was luck

MUNGOJERRIE:
And some of the time you would say it was weather

BOTH:
We go through the house like a hurricane
And no sober person could take his oath

MUNGOJERRIE:
Was it Mungojerrie? [bad word]  [bad word] 

BOTH:
Or could you have sworn that it mightn't be both?

MUNGOJERRIE:
And when you hear a dining room smash [bad word] 
Or up from the pantry [bad word] a loud crash

MUNGOJERRIE:
Or down from the library [bad word] a loud ping [bad word] 
From a vase that [bad word] said to be Ming

BOTH:
Then the family will say: "Now which was which cat?
It was Mungojerrie [bad word] "

And there's nothing at all to be done about that!