Hello
 [bad word] to the show
Thought we broke up years ago

What's up
I just [bad word] my pants
gambled and I lost

Good times
just blew out my knee
I've fallen and I can't get up

Oh [bad word] 
I think I broke my back
where's the wheelchair?

I'm old school
I'm played out (out, out, out)
Osteoporosis
 [bad word] and neurosis
The vultures circling
above our balding heads

Second verse
the same as the first
I forgot the words again

Railer
lost my inhaler
who's got a smoke for the Caper?

Hold on
let me catch my breath
All right I feel better now
Take it to the bridge

I'll never be Ozzy
On stage when I'm fifty
I'm gonna look like Elvis
By the time I'm forty

We're already bogus
We're already fading
We'll never be The Rolling Stones
I'm staying home

Dementia and senility
My failing muscles atrophy
I've lost all ability
Falling apart!

Blue hair, brown teeth
Failing livers,defeat
Maybe we will try to pull it off
for another year