He calls me back when he says he's gonna
Lets me crank up 80s Madonna
Treatin' me like everyday is my birthday
And when I'm down he makes it OK
 [bad word] home to flowers on my doorstep
It's not even Valentine's day yet
He doesn't check out any other girl
Makes me feel like I'm his world

He's every girl's dream
 [bad word] like we're 13
You know what I mean

I take my shot, I gave him all I got
But he was in my blindspot
It's not me, it's him!
Gave him an easy [bad word] 
I can't believe he missed that one
He swings the other way
Now I realize he's playing for the other team

He cries at movies I don't even cry at
Always askin' me if he looks fat in that
Knows what's up with the latest in fashion
Singin' songs from Cats is his passion

He's every girl's dream
 [bad word] like we're 13
You know what I mean

I take my shot, I gave him all I got
But he was in my blindspot
It's not me, it's him!
Gave him an easy [bad word] 
I can't believe he missed that one
He swings the other way
Now I realize he's playing for the other team

Houston, I guess we have some problems
But I don't really wanna solve 'em
I'd miss his friendship if I broke his [bad word] 
Tell me, is it wrong to like him this much?

I take my shot, I gave him all I got
But he was in my blindspot
It's not me, it's him!
Gave him an easy [bad word] 
I can't believe he missed that one
He swings the other way
Now I realize he's playing for the other team