Baby, pass the aspirin,
Something's gotta work
I know I did it to myself
But man oh man it hurts
That second last martini
The one that went down real smooth
Set me on the bender
With nothing left to lose

I just can't apologize
For what I did to myself
My bed's an ocean liner
And I can't call for help

[2x:]
Yeah baby, it hurts a bunch
The girls got going and we had a munch
I promise on a dime
It's the last time
I'll ever have a liquid lunch

I think I've got the symptoms
And none of them will leave
They think that it's a party
To laugh at all my grief
It must've been a doozy,
I had 200 dreams
At least I found my pillow
'Cause I can't find my keys

It's hard to remember
All of the events
But I must have paid the tab
'Cause all that's left is fifty cents

[2x:]
Yeah baby, it hurts a bunch
The girls got going and we had a munch
I promise on a dime
It's the last time
I'll ever have a liquid lunch

Maybe I can call the pharmacy
They'll bring something up,
Something up 'tout suite'
Some exotic medicine
To cure my every ill
With some kind of magic pill

I just can't apologize (I can't apologize)
For what I did to myself
My bed's an ocean liner
And I can't call for help

[2x:]
Yeah baby, it hurts a bunch
The girls got going and we had a munch
I promise on a dime
It's the last time
I'll ever have a liquid lunch

Yeah baby, it hurts a bunch (baby it hurts a bunch)
The girls got going and we had a munch (oh oh)
I promise on a dime
It's the last time
I'll ever have a liquid lunch (to do do do to to)
Yeah baby, it hurts a bunch (mmm)
The girls got going and we had a munch
I promise on a dime
It's the last time

I'll never have a liquid lunch