Dear? Is that you, my dear husband? My eyes aren’t what they used to be. Have you seen my little birdies? The dear things must be starving without their granny. Here, birdies! 

Oh, my my my. I think I have gentleman callers again, but not the way I used to, not the nice ones. I hear them and they’re not very polite ones either. Granny Rags, Granny Rags, let us in. Ah well, they’ll go away again if they know what’s good for them, but what a bother. Here’s the key to the front door, love. You’ll see to [bad word]  won’t you?