Britney gets injections in her cheeks, I'm like Woody Harrelson Pounds of trees Celebrity roast, I'm like Howie on speed
Ashley Judd our caps thick Christina Aguilera's a hater,
it's cool - she only suck black [bad word] Levay got Jane beheaded, Son of Sam loves Zeppelin
Manson ran with the Beach Boys, brought his heaters and medicine
Pete Townsend: internet pedophile and [bad word] Micheal's been buggin', [bad word]  these boys for twenty-two years
Givin' 'em wine, so get away with blood and tango
OJ's still up in clubs lookin' for blondes to strangle
John Candy: poisioned, Andy Gibb was infected
Marilyn weighed a buck seventy, Dahmer's fridge was protected
Bobby turnin' Whitney out, Janet's [bad word] was flooded
Lil' Kim is a disease, Keanu Reeves' got a husband
Walk through walls like David Blaine, I'm ballin' in Maryland
Like Macy Grey at the [bad word] out zapped on heroin

Celebrity roast, everybody gets it, everybody knows
You could be the next contestant, keep you on your [bad word] toes
You're still a [bad word]  [bad word] I'll rip you out your [bad word]  clothes
You act as a [bad word]  when the camera's on you play the role

Your wife's eager to take DP's like Catherine Zeta
Avril Lavigne loves beads, Missy [bad word] on [bad word]  a train in Nicole Ritchie, she's lovin' the needle
junkie [bad word] like Yasmin Bleek and a [bad word] that's lethal
Misogynist tapes with a killer grimace like Robert Blake
Mariah slit her wrist cause half her face got hit with a rake
Angelina Jolie is sucking off her brother and father
I need [bad word] thats tough with fat asses like Jennifer Garner
Bendin' her over, coat her with the dips and K
I got a smelly cage with the wife of Nick Lachey
Smashin' up whips like Billy Joel destroying the document
Takin' acid like Kennedy, black masks with protestants (backwards)
Melissa Force sucking me off, Chris Farley ate enough coke
With hookers on dope to choke a [bad word]  horse
Carmen Electra takes fourteen, no problem
I'm on top, we [bad word] Hollywood, I got 'em

Celebrity roast, everybody gets it, everybody knows
You could be the next contestant, keep you on your [bad word] toes
You're still a [bad word]  [bad word] I'll rip you out your [bad word]  clothes
You act as a [bad word]  when the camera's on you play the role