Citizens of Oz:
Ev'ry day, more wicked!
Ev'ry day, the terror grows!
All of Oz is ever on alert!
That's the way with Wicked -
Spreading fear where e'er she goes
Seeking out new victims she can hurt!

Ozian (Female):
Like some terrible green blizzard
Throughout the land she flies

Ozian (Male):
Defaming our poor Wizard
With her calumnies and lies!

All:
She lies!
Save us from the Wicked!
Shield us so we won't be hexed!
Give us warning
Where will she strike next?
Where will she strike next?
Where will she strike next?

Glinda:
(spoken) Fellow Ozians – as terrifying as terror is,
let us put aside our panic for this one day and celebrate!
(sung) Oh what a celebration
We'll have today

Ozians:
Thank Goodness!

Glinda:
Let's have a celebration
The Glinda way!

Ozians:
Thank Goodness!

Madame Morrible:
Fin'lly a day that's
Totally Wicked-Witch free!

Ozians:
We couldn't be happier
Thank Goodness!

Glinda:
Yes -
We couldn't be happier,
Right, dear?
Couldn't be happier
Right here
Look what we've got
fairy-tale plot
Our very own happy ending
Where we couldn't be happier - [bad word]  dear?
Couldn't be happier
And we're happy to share
Our ending vicariously
With all of you
He couldn't look handsomer
I couldn't feel humbler
We couldn't be happier
Because happy is what happens
When all your [bad word] [bad word] 

Madame Morrible:
(spoken) And Glinda dear, we're happy for you!
As Press Secretary, I have striven to ensure that all of Oz
knows the story of your braverism

(sung) The day you were first summoned
To an audience with Oz
And although he would not tell you why initially
When you bowed before his throne
He decreed you'd hence be known
As Glinda the Good – officially!

Then with a jealous squeal
The Wicked Witch burst from concealment
Where she had been lurking -surrpetitially!

Ozians:
I hear she has an extra eye
That always remains awake
I hear that she can shed her skin
As easily as a snake!
I hear some rebel Animals
Are giving her food and shelter!
I hear her soul is so unclean
Pure water can melt her!

Fiyero:
What?

Ozians:
Melt her!
Please – somebody go and melt her!

Fiyero:
(spoken) Do you hear that – water will melt her?!
People are so empty-headed, they'll believe anything!

Glinda:
(spoken) Fiyero! Oh – yes, thanks plenty, dearest!
He's gone to fetch me a refreshment.
He's so thoughtful that way!

(sung) That's why I couldn't be happier
No, I couldn't be happier
Though it is, I admit
The tiniest bit
Unlike I anticipated
But I couldn't be happier
Simply couldn't be happier
(spoken) Well – not "simply"
(sung) 'Cause getting your dreams
It's strange, but it seems
little – well [bad word] There's a kind of a sort of cost
There's a couple of things get lost
There are bridges you cross
You didn't know you crossed
Until you've crossed
And if that joy, that thrill
Doesn't thrill you like you think it will
Still -
With this perfect finale
The cheers and ballyhoo
Who
Wouldn't be happier?
So I couldn't be happier
Because happy is what happens
When all your [bad word] [bad word] Well, isn't it?
Happy is what happens
When your [bad word] [bad word] 

Ozians:
We love you, Glinda, if we may be so frank

Glinda:
Thank Goodness!

Ozians:
For all this joy, we know who we've got to thank
Thank Goodness!
That means the Wizard, Glinda

Glinda:
And fiance!

Ozians:
They couldn't be goodlier