Bertha Lou, Bertha Lou
 Let me slip around with you
 If I could raise some sand
 I'd be a mighty-mighty man
 'Cause you're so ooooh, Bertha Lou

 Bertha Lou, Bertha Lou
 Gotta get a date with you
 If I could hear you moan
 On Mr. Bell's telephone
 Ain't no tellin' what I'd do, Bertha Lou

 You wear your hair in a poodle cut
 You're walkin' down the street like a [bad word]  And everybody knows that you're so sweet
 You tickle from head to my athlete's feet

 Hey-hey, Bertha Lou
 I wanna conjugate with you
 You know my blood [bad word]  wild
 And I know you ain't no child
 When you do what you do, Bertha Lou
 (Rock! Rock! Rock!)

 You wear your hair in a poodle cut
 You're walkin' down the street like a [bad word]  And everybody knows that you're so sweet
 You tickle from head to my athlete's feet

 Hey-hey, Bertha Lou
 I wanna congregate with you
 You know my blood [bad word]  wild
 And I know you ain't no child
 When you do what you do, Bertha Lou

 Bertha Lou, Bertha Lou, Bertha Lou