'Long about midnight, When everybody else has long been sleeping', he'll be creepin' Down to the kitchen of the house

'Long about midnight, When nobody else is even moving', he'll be groovin' Quieter than a mouse, down to the kitchen of the house

He pokes his head around the corner, To make sure nobody's in sight, Jumps up on the kitchen table, To see what the cat can drag out tonight!

Around midnight, When everybody else is safely sacking', he'll be snackin', On a leg o' lamb, toast and jam, lasagna in the pan, 'Long 'bout the middle of the night

Now does he regret it? Yes he feels so very blue, And when he gets too round, He tries to cut down, But only for an hour or two

Then around midnight, When that ol' hunger gets to stirring', he'll go purring', Light on his feet, till he starts to eat! Long about the middle of the night