I never had a sister 
that you didn't like
You had three ugly brothers
but still turned out all right, yeah

I never had a girlfriend 
longer than three months
you never had a boyfriend
but married on a hunch

so let's ride bikes into the sea
and catch a bus outside the reef
drive so deep that we can see
thinks that we have to get off
the bus driver laughs and he shakes his head
says, "You're okay, I drive this route everyday"
you're uneasy and you say you're scared
and if I die at least you'll die too

I never had a sister 
but you, you look swell
wearing your matching shorts 
as often as the [bad word] 
you look like Audrey Hepburn
when you get all dressed up
I have seen all your movies 
'cause Audrey's a stone fox

so let's ride bikes into the sea
and catch a bus outside the reef
drive so deep where we can see
thinks that we have to get off
The bus driver laughs and he shakes his head
says, "You're okay, I drive this route everyday"
you're uneasy and you say you're scared
and if I die at least you'll die too