[Intro]
lot of people ask me stupid [bad word]  questions
lot of people think that what I say on record
Or what I talk about on a record
That I actually do in real life, or that I believe in it
Or if I say that I wanna kill somebody, that
I'm actually gonna do it, or that I believe in it
Well [bad word]  if you believe that, then I'll kill you
You know why?

Cuz I'm a criminal
Criminal
(You [bad word] right)
I'm a criminal
Yeah, I'm a criminal

[Eminem]
My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge
And I'll stab you in the head, whether you're a [bad word] or les
homo, hermaph, or a transeves
Pants address, hey [bad word]  the answer's yes
Homophobic?
Nah, you're just heterophobic
Starin' in my jeans, watchin' my genetiles bulgin'
That's my [bad word]  balls, you better let go of 'em
They belong in my [bad word]  you'll never get ahold of 'em
Hey, it's me, Versace
Whoops, somebody shot me
And I was just checkin' the mail
Get it, checkin' the male?
How many records you expectin' to sell?
After your second LP sends you directly to [bad word] on, relax cat
I like [bad word] men, right Ken?
Give me an Amen
"Amen!"
Please Lord, this boy needs Jesus
Heal this child, help us destroy these demons
Uh, please send me a brand new car
And a prostitute, while my wife's sick in the hospital
Preacher, preacher, 5th grade teacher
You can't reach me, my mom can't neither
You can't teach me a [bad word] thing
Cuz I watch TV [bad word] cable
And you ain't able to stop these thoughts
You can't stop me from toppin' these charts
And you can't stop me from droppin' each March
With a brand new CD for these [bad word]  retards
And to think, it's just lil' ol' me
Mr. 'don't give a [bad word]  still won't leave
I'm a...

I'm a criminal
Cuz everytime I write a rhyme
These people think it's a crime to tell 'em what's on my mind
I guess I'm a criminal
I don't gotta say a word
I just flip 'em the bird and keep goin'
I don't take [bad word] from no one

I'm a criminal
Cuz everytime I write a rhyme
These people think it's a crime to tell 'em what's on my mind
I guess I'm a criminal
I don't gotta say a word
I just flip 'em the bird and keep goin'
I don't take [bad word] from no one

The mother did [bad word]  hard liquor, cigarettes and speed
The baby came out disfigured, ligaments in need
It was a seed who would grow up just as crazy as she
Don't dare make fun of that baby cuz that baby was me
I'm a criminal
An animal caged to turn crazed
But how the [bad word] you supposed to grow up when you weren't raised?
So as I got older and I got a lot taller
My [bad word] [bad word] smaller but my balls got larger
I drink more liquor to [bad word] you up quicker
Then you'd wanna [bad word] me after sayin' a word
My morals went *pft* when the president got oral [bad word] in his Oval Office on top of his desk
From his own employee, now don't ignore me
You won't avoid me, you can't miss me
I'm white, blonde hair, and my nose is pointy
I'm the bad guy who makes fun of people that die
In plane crashes, and laughs, as long as it ain't happen to him
Slim Shady, I'm as crazy as Eminem and [bad word] (The maniac sent) In place of the doctor
Cuz Dre couldn't make it today
He's a little under the weather, so I'm takin' his place
Oh, that's Dre, with an AK to his face
Don't make me kill him too and spray his brains all over the place
I told you Dre, you should kept that thing put away
I guess that'll teach you not to let me play with an I'm a criminal!

[Dre] (Eminem)
Alright look (uh-huh)
Just go up in that [bad word] Get the [bad word]