On the freeway, all the cares have stopped
'Cause the big news has dropped
All the phones are ringing
It's got all the neighbors singing

Police chief is calling the detectives
Navy SEALs are being selected
President is calling his advisors
Greenpeace is putting out flyers

We've got ourselves a little situation
It's worse than an alien invasion
Jennifer has got a cold and
Everybody's got to know

We've got ourselves a little situation
It's worse than an alien invasion
Jennifer has got a cold and
She [bad word] to no one

There's a news break, for everybody watching
Jennifer has just started coughing
The doctors can't explain it(hah)
"How did she ever obtain this?"

All her friends are sending get well cards
"You could beat it, just gotta fight hard!"
All the world is sitting home waiting
All the priests are singing and praying

We've got ourselves a little situation
It's worse than an alien invasion
Jennifer has got a cold and
Everybody's got to know

We've got ourselves a little situation
It's worse than an alien invasion
Jennifer has got a cold and
She [bad word] to no one

Yeeeaaaaaahhhh!

SWAT team has Jennifer surrounded
Coast guard takes her to an island
Out there, no one gets infected
Jenny lives where she can be protected

United Nation emergency meeting
Declares the whole world is grieving
And peace [bad word] if Jenny just gets well [bad word] home soon!

We've got ourselves a little situation
It's worse than an alien invasion
Jennifer has got a cold and
Everybody's got to know

We've got ourselves a little situation
It's worse than an alien invasion
Jennifer has got a cold and
She [bad word] to no one!