I have no motivation to carry on. 
I force my conversations; 
connoisseur of faking smiles. 
Keeping distance from the people that misjudge me. 
I keep distance from everybody. 

I wish I could be a [bad word] child again. 
The weight of the world didn't [bad word] me then. 
I accepted life. No, I [bad word] it. 
But I've grown up. 

I've opened my eyes. 
(I see no light, no savior) 
I've accepted my fate. 
(I'm not afraid) 

Cut the thread.