Anytime the wind is blowing - that’s when girlies’ eyes start glowing
Finally they think they’ll know - what’s under the kilt
Just because I don’t wear trouser - what’s the thing that so arouses
All of you in skirts and blouses - cotton or silk

Cos I’m the lad they fancy
All the lassies and their aunties
Wonder if I’m wearing panties
Under the kilt

So down in Sauchihall Street - that’s where the people all meet
They’ll never get it from me - nobody will
 [bad word] 

Oh-aye, the bonnie lassies
Oh-aye, my purple glasses
Oh-I’ve a few suprises
Under the kilt

Oh-aye, the bonnie lassies
Oh-aye, my purple glasses
Oh-aye, my feet are dancing
Under the kilt

Uncle Shug and auntie Morag - cousin Duff and Jock the toe-rag
They [bad word] with grandma Flora - everyone will

To see the rain and hear the thunder
It’s a magic place down-under
In my kingdom full of wonder
Under the kilt
 [bad word] 
Swing it high and swing it low - ready now it’s time to [bad word] along and wave your tartan - this is where the party’s starting

Oh-aye, the pipes are blowing
Oh-aye, my feet are going
Tipity-tappety tippity-tappety
Under the kilt
 [bad word] 2

Swing it high and swing it low - ready now it’s time to [bad word] along and wave your tartan - this is where the party’s starting

Oh-aye, the pipes are blowing
Oh-aye, my feet are going
Tipity-tappety tippity-tappety
Under the kilt

Tipity-tappety tippity-tappety
Under the kilt