We're a couple of swells 
We stop at the best hotels 
But we prefer the country far away from the city smells 
We're a couple of sports 
The pride of the tennis courts 
In June, July and August we look cute when we're dressed in shorts 
The Vanderbilts have asked us up for tea 
We don't know how to get there, no siree 
No, siree 

We would drive up the Avenue, but we haven't got the price 
We would skate up the Avenue, but there isn't any ice 
We would ride on a bicycle, but we haven't got a bike 
So we'll walk up the Avenue 
Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue 
And to walk up the Avenue's what we like 

Wall Street bankers are we 
With plenty of currency 
We'd open up the safe but we forgot where we put the key 
We're the favorite lads 
Of girls in the picture ads 
We'd like to tell you who we kissed last night but we can't be cads 
The Vanderbilts are waiting at the club 
But how are we to get there, that's [bad word] 
That's [bad word] 

We would sail up the Avenue, but we haven't got a yacht 
We would drive up the Avenue, but the horse we had was shot 
We would ride on a trolley car but we haven't got the fare 
So we'll walk up the Avenue 
Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue 
Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue till we're there 

We would swim up the Avenue but we haven't any lake 
So we'll walk up the Avenue 
Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue 
Yes, a walk up the Avenue's what we'll take