Oh, Mr. Crest, Mr. Crest
How in the world you
Expect for me to rest?
Oh, Mr. Crest, Mr. Crest
How in the world you
Expect for me to rest?
You got my 22-20
Layin' up across my breast

Oh, if I send for my baby
An she act a fool
An she don't [bad word] 
If I send for my baby
She act a fool
An she don't [bad word] 
All the doctors in New York City
I declare, they can't help her none

You know, sometimes she gets [bad word] 
An she act like she just don't wanna do
Sometimes she gets [bad word] 
An she act like she just don't wanna -
But I'll get my 22-20
I'll cut that woman half in two

Oh, your.38 Special
Buddy, it's most too light
Your .38 Special
Buddy, it's most too light
But my 22-20
Will make ev'rything, alright

Ah-or, your .44-40
Buddy, it'll do very well
Your .44-40
Buddy, it'll do very well
But my .22-20
I declare you, it's a-burnin' [bad word] 

I was stranded on the highway-hi
With my 22-20 in my -
I was standin' on the highway
With my 22-20 in my -
They got me 'cussed for murder
I declare, I never have harmed a man

Lord, on I measure my gun
An it's just a-long as my right arm
I measured my gun
An it's just as long as my right -
I'm gon' raise me some sand
And back down the road, I declare.