You're always up to no good 
Your fingers in my cookiejar 
You can have my checkbook, visa 
And my mastercard too 
Ain't no price to high for what you do 

You could be my dog 
I would post your bailbonds when cash was tight 
We could fall in love 
I could be the apple of your eye 
Let's do it right now 

My new favourite thing to do 
Is wasting my time on a bum like you 
My new favourite thing to do 
Is wasting my time on a bum like you 

Your car's a dump and you're broke 
But that's all right 
I never liked them fancy guys 
You don't even look good 
God it ain't right 
But you're starry-eyed and out of sight 

You could fall apart 
I would post your bailbonds when cash was tight 
We could fall in love 
I could be the apple of your eye 
Let's do it right now 

My new favourite thing to do 
Is wasting my time on a bum like you 
My new favourite thing to do 
Is wasting my time on you 
My new favourite thing to do 
Is wasting my time on a bum like you 
My new favourite thing to do 
Is wasting my time on a bum like you 

You're always up to no good 
You catch on like a bonfire 
Every single worn out line is shiney and new 
I never met a sweeter liar 

You could be my king 
I would knit you mittens and make you pie 
We could fall in love 
I could be the apple of your eye 
Let's do it right now 

My new favourite thing to do 
Is wasting my time on a bum like you 
My new favourite thing to do
Is wasting my time on you 
My new favourite thing to do 
Is wasting my time on a bum like you 
My new favourite thing to do
Is wasting my time on a bum like you 
Wasting my time on a bum like you 
Wasting my time on a bum like you.