[bad word] closes on a sunday
new town, curtain on a thursday
I'm still waiting for my chance
the director says no but I think I'm ready

god knows the story is a bore
don't you think you've heard this song before
one two three four, everybody sing along
big smiles, everybody loves a showtune

oh leading man, once a star of screen and stage
now an alcoholic hollywood cliche
I admit I may have had it in for him
but I swear I didn't think when I hadn't him the drink

he'd end up passed out an lying on the floor
the understudy had quit the day before
I knew my chance [bad word] at last
the curtain went up, the [bad word] was singing

I hit my marks and danced across the floor
tonight I'll be the one that they adore
oh just keep smiling, keep laughing
everybody loves a showtune
everybody loves a showtune

that's when the man in the fedora
grabs my arm and pulls me to the floor
I'm shouting, get off of me
the curtain goes down, the [bad word] still singing

I'm crawling madly for the door
the audience starts calling for an encore
I stood and turned and took a bow
and smiled for the crowd 
everybody loves a showtune
everybody loves a showtune