And I broke my promise on a very sharp rock
And I was possessed by something quite unfriendly
And I was haunted by a demon in my sleep
That's how I learned how to survive

And I gave a beer to a bum that was drinking
And I gave some sauce to my bestest friend for cooking
And I gave water to all who I thought were thirsty
That's how I learned how to survive

And I gave my money to the bank for safe keeping
And I gave my money to my landlord, he was needing it
And I gave attention to the TV that was bleeding
That's how I learned how to survive

If you ain't got the do re mi, boys 
If you ain't got the do re mi
Well you better go back to beautiful Texas
Oklahoma, Kansas, Georgia, Tennessee
California is a Garden of Eden
And paradise to live in or see
But believe it or not
You won't find it so hot
If you ain't got the do re mi

And we totally  ripped off a man named Woodie Guthrie
And I bought a restaurant for his Sunday Dallas
And I gave false information to the audience
That's how I learned how to survive

And I give a thank you to my father for not raising me
And I give a finger to my step father for beating me
And I give props to myself for achieving
God [bad word]  I'm glad that I survived
God [bad word]  I am surprised that I survived

And I just handed you a giant load of gibberish
And I give love to a lover quite deserving of it
And I give thanks to all of you for listening to the
Story of how we learned how to survive.