Out of all the reindeers you know you're the mastermind [bad word]  [bad word]  Randolph ain't too far behind [bad word]  [bad word]  Santa's got to make it to town
Santa make him hurry, tell him he can take the freeway down [bad word]  [bad word] 'cause I'm reelin' like a merry-go-round

Said Santa to a boy child "What have you been longing for?"
"All I want for Christmas is a Rock and Roll electric guitar"
And then away [bad word] a-whizzing like a shooting star [bad word]  [bad word]  Santa's got to make it to town,
Santa make him hurry, tell him he can take the freeway down [bad word]  [bad word]  reeling like a merry-go-round

Said Santa to a girl child "What would please you most to get?"
"little baby doll that can cry, sleep, drink and wet"
And then away [bad word] a-whizzing like a Saber jet [bad word]  [bad word]  Santa's got to make it to town
Santa make him hurry, tell him he can take the freeway down [bad word]  [bad word] 'cause I'm reelin' like a merry-go-round