You walk into the room with your pencil in your hand
You see somebody naked, you say, "Who is that man?"
You try so hard but you don't understand
Just what you'll say when you get home

But there something is happening here
And you don't know what it is
Do you, Mister Jones?

You raise up your head, you ask, "Is this where it is?"
And somebody points to you and says "It's his"
And you say, "What's mine?"
And somebody else says, "Where what is?"
And you say, "Oh my God am I here all alone?"

It just something is happened here
But you don't know what it is
Do you, Mister Jones?

So, you hand in your ticket, you go watch the geek
Who immediately walks up to you when he hears you speak
And says, "Well, how does it feel my friend to be such a freak?"
And you say, "Impossible" as he hands you a bone

You're positive that something is happening here
But you don't know what it is
Do you, Mister Jones?

You've so many contacts [bad word]  among the lumberjacks
To get you facts when someone attacks your imagination
But nobody has any respect anyway they already expect
You to just give a check to tax-deductible charity organizations

You've been with the professors and they've all liked your looks
With great lawyers you have discussed lepers and crooks
You've been through all of F. Scott Fitzgerald's books
You're very well read, yeah, it's well known

'Cause something is still happening here
Don't know what it is
Do you, Mister Jones?

The sword swallower
 [bad word] up to you and then he kneels,
Crosses himself and then he clicks his high heels
Without further notice he tells you how it feels
And he says, "Here is your mouth back thanks for the loan"

And you know something is happening here
But you don't know what it is
Do you, Mister Jones?

Now, you see this one-eyed midget, shouting the word "NOW"
And you say, "For what reason?" And he says, "How?"
And you say, "Good God what's happenin'?"
And he screams back, "You're a cow
And give me some milk or go home"

Yes and now, you're positive something's happening
And you wish you know what it was
Do you, Mister Jones?

Well, you walk into the room like a camel and then you frown
You put your eyes in your pocket, nose in the ground
There ought to be a law against [bad word] #39; 'round
You should be made to wear some earphones

'Cause something is happened here
You don't know what it is
Do you, Mister Jones?