Got a whale of a tale to tell ya, lads
whale of a tale or two
'Bout the flapping fish and girls I've loved
On nights like this with the moon above
whale of a tale and it's all [bad word] 
I swear by my tattoo

There was Mermaid Minnie
Met her down in Madagascar
She would kiss me
Anytime that I would ask her
Then one evening
Her flame of love blew out
Blow me down and pick me up,
She swapped me for a trout!

Got a whale of a tale to tell ya, lads
whale of a tale or two
'Bout the flapping fish and girls I've loved
On nights like this with the moon above
whale of a tale and it's all [bad word] 
I swear by my tattoo

There was Typhoon Tessie
Met her on the coast of Java
When we kissed I
Bubbled up like molten lava
Then she gave me
The scare of my young life
Blow me down, and pick me up
She was the captain's wife!

Got a whale of a tale to tell ya, lads
whale of a tale or two
'Bout the flapping fish and girls I've loved
On nights like this with the moon above
whale of a tale and it's all [bad word] 
I swear by my tattoo

Then there was Harpoon Hannah
Had a look that spelled out danger
My heart quivered when she whispered,
"I'm there, stranger"
Bought her trinkets
That sailors can't afford
(Sailors can't afford)
And when I spent my last red cent
She tossed me overboard!

Got a whale of a tale to tell ya, lads
whale of a tale or two
'Bout the flapping fish and girls I've loved
On nights like this with the moon above
whale of a tale and it's all [bad word] 
I swear by my tattoo!