Standing in a bog of a West End bar
Guy on the right leaning over too far
Money in my pocket, gonna put it in the slot
Open up the pack, see what type I've got

I didn't want to hold you
I didn't want to use you
Protex, protex blue
All I wanna do

It's a fab protective for that type of a girl
But everybody knows that she uses it well
It's the therapeutic [bad word]  I can use at will
But I don't think it fits my B.D. drill

I didn't want to hold you
I didn't want to use you
Protex, protex blue
All I wanna do

Protex, protex blue
All I wanna do

Sitting in a carriage on a Bakerloo
Erotica my pocket, got a packet for you
Advert on the escalator on my way home
I don't need no skin flicks, I wanna be alone

I didn't want to hold you
I didn't want to use you
Protex, protex blue
All I wanna do

Johnny, Johnny!