Yeah, I'm such a liar, one time I told you
You were the highlight of all of my ual life,
While I'm confessing, when you're undressing,
I was picking the lock on your safe with my knife.

Einstein.

If you're so naive that you believe
Everything I said to you,
Well, I got your  and [bad word] checks.
Well, what did ya think I was gonna do?

My reputation for exaggeration,
It never got to you,
That's why I left Duluth,
Sometimes I stretch the [bad word] 

My dearest darling, you know that luggage?
It belonged to the blond with the really nice pair,
And incidentally I sorely missed you,
Pain was so hard to bear.

If I would rate ya, not that I hate ya,
But you would end up eighth, maybe ninth in your class,
Your build is hot now, if you could use your
Brain like you use your [bad word] 
Mmm.

Oh, you're so naive. How could you believe
Everything I said to you?

My reputation for exaggeration,
It never got to you,
Sometimes I'm so uncouth,
Sometimes I stretch the [bad word] 

Hey, I'm such a liar, one time I told you
You were the highlight of all of my ual life.

I'm remarkably insincere,
Incredibly insincere, totally insincere,
Oh, don't take it so hard, my dear,
I'm consistently insincere.