TOM: I'm going [bad word] back and I'm going to start a therapeutic massage center only for for... 
MARK: I'm going to start my own nudist colony 
TOM: That would be grose, you tried that in our bus one time 
MARK: I tried to start our own nudist colony in our bus and it was pretty much just me hanging out naked, they love you Tom 
TOM: They love me so [bad word] everybody else 
MARK: Yea [bad word] all you guys out there that are cheering, yea we hate you Tom you suck [bad word] burn in [bad word] 
TOM: Yea [bad word] that, hey I say I say [bad word] the hating Tom thing that's what I say, are we ready Mark 
MARK: You know what it is you know what it is a lot of these people are just now hopping on the we hate Tom bandwagon, like I've been hating tom since like 1995 I'm old school hating Tom guy alright 
TOM: Oh [bad word]  hey let's all say some dirty words, everybody say [bad word]  everybody say [bad word]  everyone say [bad word]  everyone say Mark's an [bad word] hole 
MARK: Everyone say, everyone say we hate Mark, yea 
TOM: Hey now let's do this one, everyone say [bad word] [bad word] [bad word] [bad word]  that's the kind of words you should be using at home kids 
MARK: That's right 
TOM: What do we do now 
MARK: I want everyone to call me an [bad word] hole again 
TOM: What's up I like your hair it's very nice 
MARK: You like his hair oh cool thanks he probably appreciates that a lot 
TOM: I wanted to say I liked your but but I thought that was to foward you know 
MARK: Hey this next song is for all the ladies in the hezouse, hea he it's for all the ladies in the heoueoueouze 
TOM: Mark! 
MARK: What 
TOM: Shut the [bad word] up 
MARK: It's for all the ladies in the houaeiouze, weee. Hey you know what hang on I want to make this like a 
TOM: (belch) exuse me 
MARK: Exuse Tom 
TOM: Sorry 
MARK: I want to make this like a big golf tournimant everyone shut up everybody just clap like it's a golf tourniment 
TOM: That's what it sounds like when I get done having , 15,000 people cheering me on, I could take all of you in my bed right [bad word] now, but you're not invited Mark. You have got giant [bad word] and I doubt you're 18, do you have a note from your mom, I want to meet your mom... 
MARK: Hey put those 13 year old [bad word] away, if I wanted to see 13 year old [bad word] I'd hang out by the Junior high like my dad like my dad does 
TOM: Hey you know what I learned in fifth grade 
MARK: What's that your dad has a bent weiner 
TOM: My dad's weiner was bigger than mine then and still is 
MARK: I want everyone here to scream, [bad word] you Tom,we [bad word] hate you you're going to burn in [bad word] and die a horrible firery death cause' we hate you stupid pieces of [bad word] 
TOM: I heard that 
MARK: Thanks 
TOM: You want to give me your shirt, this smells like blood and [bad word]  dinner time ok what does this say here 
MARK: It smells like blood and [bad word]  so it's your dad's shirt 
TOM: Hey uh just like every other band we believe in a safe form of  don't we Mark, that we do so Mark's going to tell you about how safe we are 
MARK: Let me tell you about the safest form of , it's when you get super [bad word] and you have  with like ten people totally unprotected and you do intravenous [bad word] at the same time, no it's not [bad word] 
TOM: It's not [bad word] you have to carry a weapon. How many of you guys have girlfreinds and how many of your girlfriends have guy friends, I hope you're not having  
MARK: And more importanly how many of your girlfriends have girlfriends 
TOM: Cause' we believe in the love that exists between two vaginas 
MARK: The most special kind of love of all is the love that exists between two naked women while I watch 
TOM: We need her to put her shirt back on 
MARK: Please 
TOM: It just took away my boner, my boner just died, I had one and now it's gone 
MARK: Please I saw your [bad word] and my wiener ran away. Hey hey hang on everyone everyone seriously I need your att