(Tony Banks/Phil [bad word] 

Got out of bed, wasn't feeling too good
With my wallet and my passport, a new pair of shoes
The sun is shining so I head for the park,
With a bottle of Tequila, and a new pack of cigarettes

I got a cousin and she got a friend,
Who thought that her aunt knew a man who could help
At his apartment I knocked on the door,
He [bad word] out until he got paid.
Now don't tell anybody what I wanna do
If they find out you know that they'll never let me through.

It's no fun being an illegal alien
It's no fun being an illegal alien

Down at the office had to fill out the forms
pink one, a red one, the colours you choose,
Up to the counter to see what they think
They said 'It doesn't count man, it ain't written in ink'.
Don't [bad word] anybody least not around here, cos

It's not fun being and illegal alien,
It's not fun being and illegal alien,
It's not fun being and illegal alien,
It's not fun being and illegal alien,
An illegal alien, O.K.

Consideration for your fellow man
Wouldn't hurt anybody, sure fits in with my plan
Over the border, there lies the promised land

So don't tell anybody what I wanna do
If they find out you know that they'll never let me through.

It's no fun being an illegal alien,
It's no fun being an illegal alien,
It's no fun being an illegal alien,
It's no fun being an illegal alien.