"Mrs. McGrath," the sergeant said,
"Would you like a soldier
of your son, Ted?
With a scarlet cloak and a fine [bad word] hat,
Mrs. McGrath wouldn't you like that?"

Mrs. McGrath lived on the shore
And after seven years or more
Till she say a big ship sail into the bay,
"Here's my son, Ted, will ye clear the way!"

"Oh, Captain dear, where have you been.
Have you been out sailin' on the Mediteren'.
Will ye tell me the news of my son, Ted?
Is the poor boy livin', or is he dead?"

Now came Ted without any legs
And in their place two wooden pegs
She kissed him a dozen times or two
Saying "My God Ted is it you?"

"Now were you [bad word] or were you blind
When you left your two fine legs behind?
Or was it walking upon the sea
That wore your two fine legs away?"

"No I wasn't [bad word] and I wasn't blind
When I left my two fine legs behind.
a cannon ball on the fifth of May
Tore my two fine legs away."

"Now Teddy boy," the widow cried
"Your two fine legs was your mother's pride
Them stumps of a tree won't do at all
Why didn't [bad word] from the cannon ball?"

"Well, all foreign wars I do proclaim
Between Don John and the King of Spain,
I'd rather have my son as he used to be
Than the king of France and his whole navy"