Quit acting so friendly
Don't nod, don't laugh all nicely
Don't think you'll up-end me
Don't sigh, don't sip your iced-tea
And don't say, "It's been a while..."
And don't flash that stupid smile

Don't ask me, don't ask me, don't ask me
Ask me, ask me how I've been

Don't think I've forgotten
You never liked that necklace
So cordial, so rotten
Kiss, kiss, let's meet for breakfast
Don't show up so on-time
And don't act like you're so kind

Don't ask me, don't ask me, don't ask me
Ask me, ask me how I've been
Don't ask me, don't ask me, ow!

So don't sit there and play just
So frank, so straight, so candid
So thoughtful, so gracious
So sound, so even-handed
Don't be so [bad word] benign
And don't waste my [bad word] time

Don't ask me, don't ask me, don't ask me
Ask me, ask me how I've been
Don't ask, hey
Don't ask, hey
Don't ask, hey
Don't, don't, don't ask me
Don't, don't, don't ask me
Don't, don't, don't ask me
Don't, don't, don't!
Don't ask me, don't ask me, don't ask me
Don't ask me, don't ask me, don't ask me
Ask me, ask me how I've been