I am the left brain, I am the left brain
I work really hard 'til my inevitable death brain
You got a job you better do it right in the right way is with the left brains might

I like oreos and [bad word] yah! (yes, in that order)
And I cried for at least an hour after watching Toy Story 3 (Woody!)
Cause I am the right brain, I have feelings,
I'm a little all over the place but I'm lustful and [bad word] and I'm looking for somebody to love... Or put my [bad word] in
 [bad word] a female, [bad word] a female
Puff your chest. I'll take your phone out and check your email
Or evolutionary purpose is to repopulate
So gather data now and see if she's a possible mate

Holy [bad word] I think she might be the one, there's something about her, I just can't describe it [bad word] I am the earth, she is the glorious sun
I want her to [bad word] me and I just want her to- how do i say this- sit on my face!
(Sit! Sit on my face!)

Alright now right brain you're being insane
No left brain, I'm just being alive
You should try it, you might like it

I worked hard to give him everything he cared about
You were worried about the things that he was scared about
I'm calm and collected when you act wild
I am the adult, you are child

You think you're the right one every time
You think you know everything but you don't know anything at all
Half of his problems were supposed to be mine
But you wanted everything.
I hope that you're happy 'cause he's sure not

Well according to my calculations, I'm sorry just let [bad word] the numbers again, you're a giant [bad word] 
Really name calling? Really? You're gonna just do name calling?

I'm name calling names alright, I'm just stating facts alright, the fact is you're a quivering [bad word] 
I'm the [bad word]  Really? Well at least I don't play with toys still [bad word] s cubes are not toys alright, they keep my spacial rethink skills... sharp

Left brain plays with toys! Haha, [bad word] 
Look at you, Mr... you're a toy player

Well at least I did my [bad word] job, all right. I kept him working, I kept him productive
You were supposed to look after him
You were supposed to keep him emotionally stable for all this
Now you're trying to blame me for how he's feeling, how he's feeling!
If he's feeling unhappy it's because you failed him
You did this to him, he hates you I know he does, he [bad word] hates you!

Right brain, look, I'm sorry, okay?

No, you're not

Look, maybe there's something we could do together

Together?

Take the best parts of both of us and put them together

I'm listening

It would let you let your feelings out, it would let me analyze

So you could man the themes; I'll man the form.
It's something that George Carlin did, it's something Steve Martin did
It's something special that we could both perform.
Do you know what it is?

Juggling, we could juggle, and juggle our cares away!

It [bad word]  you, [bad word] it, we could [bad word] together.

(Initiate reassembly)

All right, right brain we're gonna [bad word] together, we gotta [bad word] together

All right, left brain I'll [bad word] with you

Look, we can fix him like this- we can make him happy again. I promise, all right

Left brain... left brain, I love you