[Verse 1:]
The sun is hot and that old clock is moving slow
And so am I.
Workday passes like molasses in wintertime,
But it's July.
Getting paid by the hour and older by the minute.
My boss just pushed me over the limit.
I'd like to call him something,
But think I'll just call it a day.

 [bad word] 1:]
Pour me something tall and strong.
Make it a hurricane before I go insane.
It's only half past twelve, but I don't care.
It's five o'clock somewhere.

[Verse 2:]
Well this lunch break is gonna take all afternoon
And half the night.
Tomorrow morning I know there'll be [bad word] to pay.
Hey, but that's all right.
Ain't had a day off now in over a year.
My Jamaican vacation is gonna start right here.
If the phones for me
You can tell them I've just sailed away.

 [bad word] 1:]
Pour me something tall and strong.
Make it a hurricane before I go insane.
It's only half past twelve, but I don't care.
It's five o'clock somewhere.

 [bad word] 2:]
I could pay off my tab,
Pour myself in a cab
And be back to work before two.
At a moment like this, I can't help but wonder
What would Jimmy Buffett do?

[Jimmy Buffett spoken:]
Funny you should ask, Alan!
I'd say:
Pour me something tall and strong.
Make it a hurricane before I go insane.
It's only half past twelve, but I don't care.
Pour me somethin' tall and strong.
Make it a hurricane before I go insane.
It's only half past twelve, but I don't care.
He don't care
And I don't care.
It's five o'clock somewhere.

[Alan:] He don't care.
I don't care.

[Together:] It's five o'clock somewhere.

[Jimmy:] What time zone am I on?
What country am I in?

[Alan:]
It doesn't matter.
It's five o'clock somewhere.

[Jimmy:] It's always on five in [bad word] to think of it!

[Alan:] I heard that.

[Jimmy:] You've been there haven't you?

[Alan:] Yes, Sir.

[Jimmy:] I've seen your boat there!

[Alan:] I've been in Margaritaville a few times.

[Jimmy:] All right. That's good!

[Alan:] Stumbled my way back.

[Jimmy:] Okay. Just want to make sure you can keep it between the navigational beacons.

[Alan:] Between the bouys. I got it.

[Jimmy:] All right. It's five o'clock. Let's go somewhere.

[Alan:] I'm ready. Crank it up.

[Jimmy:] Let's get out of here.

[Alan:] I'm gone.