Scotsman clad in kilts, left the bar one evening fair 
And one could tell by how he walked he'd [bad word] more than his share 
He staggered on until he could no longer keep his feet 
then he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street. 
Oh, Ring-ding diddle diddle aye-dee-oh 
Ring di-diddle oh day 
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street. 

Well later on two young and lovely girls just happened by 
And one says to the other, with a twinkle in her eye 
"Oh see yon sleepy Scotsman, so strong and handsome built?" 
" I wonder if it's [bad word] what they don't wear beneath the kilt." 
Oh,Ring-ding diddle diddle aye-dee-oh 
Ring di-diddle- oh day
", I wonder if it's [bad word] what they don't wear beneath the kilt." 

So they creeped up to the sleeping Scotsman, quiet as could be 
And they lifted up his kilt above the waist so they could see 
And there behold, for them to view, beneath his Scottish skirt, 
Twas nothing but what God had blessed him with upon his birth. 
Oh Ring-ding diddle diddle aye-dee-oh 
Ring di-diddle-oh day 
Twas nothing but what God had blessed him with upon his birth. 

Well they marveled for a moment, then one said, "We best be gone." 
"But let's leave a present for our friend before we move along." 
So as a gift, they left a blue silk ribbon tied into a bow 
Around the bonnie star the Scot's kilt lifted showed. 
Oh Ring-ding diddle diddle aye-dee-oh 
Ring di-diddlee-oh day 
Around the bonnie star the Scot's kilt lifted show. 

When the Scotsman woke to nature's call, he stumbled towards the trees 
Behind the bush, he lifts his kilt, and he gawks at what he sees, 
And in a startled voice, he says to what's before his eyes, 
"My friend, I don't know where you've been, but I see you won first prize! 
Oh Ring-ding diddle diddle aye-dee-oh 
Ring di-diddlee-oh day 
"My friend, I don't know where you've been, but I see you won first prize!"

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