(And now, ladies and gentlemen, the Keeper of the Keys, the Countess of the Clink, the Mistress of Murderers' Row - Matron 'Mama' Morton!)

Ask any of the chickies in my pen
They'll tell you I'm the biggest mother hen
I love 'em all and all of them love me
Because the system works
The system called 
Reciprocity!

Got a little motto
Always sees me through
"When you're good to Mama
Mama's good to you".

There's a lot of favors
I'm prepared to do
You do one for Mama
She'll do one for you.

They say that life is [bad word] for tat
And that's the way I live
So, I deserve a lot of tat
For what I've got to give

Don't you know that this hand
Washes that one too
When you're good to Mama
Mama's good to you!

If you want my gravy
Pepper my ragout
Spice it up for Mama
She'll get hot for you

When they pass that basket
Folks contribute to
You put in for Mama
She'll put out for you

The folks atop the ladder
Are the ones the world adores
So boost me up my ladder, kid
And I'll boost you up yours

Let's all stroke together
Like the Princeton crew
When you're strokin' Mama
Mama's strokin' you

So what's the one conclusion
I can bring this number to?
When you're good to Mama
Mama's good to you!
Oh, yeah!