All the late night bargains have been [bad word] 
Between the satin beaus and their belles 
And prehistoric garbage [bad word] 
Have the city to themselves 
Echoes roars dinosaurs 
They're all doing the monster mash 
And most of the taxis and the whores 
Are only taking calls for cash 
I don't know how it happened 
It all took place so quick 
But all I can do is hand it to you 
And your latest trick 
My door was standing open 
Security was laid back and lax 
But it was only my heart got broken 
You must have had a pass key made out of wax 
You played robbery with insolence 
And I played the blues in twelve bars down Lover's Lane 
And you never did have the inteligence to use 
The twelve keys hanging off my chain 
I don't know how it happened 
It all took place so quick 
But all I can do is hand it to you 
And your latest trick 
Now it's past last call for alcohol 
Past recall has been here and gone 
The landlord finally paid us all 
The satin jazzmen have put away their horns 
And we're standing outside of this wonderland 
Looking so bereaved and so bereft 
Like a Bowery bum when he finally understands 
The bottle's empty and there's nothing left 
I don't know how it happened 
It was faster than the eye could flick 
But not all I can do is hand it to you 
And your latest trick