When Madam Pompadour was on a ballroom floor
Said all the gentlemen "Obviously,"
"The madam has the cutest personality"

And think of all the books about Du Barry's looks
What was it made her the toast of Paree?
She had a well-developed personality

(What did Romeo see in Juliet?)
(Or Figaro in Figarette?)
(Or Jupiter in Juno?)
You know!

And when Salome danced and had the boys entranced
No doubt it must have been easy to see
That she knew how to use her personality

(girl can learn to spell and take dictation well)
(And never sit on the boss's left knee)
(Unless she's got a perfect personality)

(girl can get somewhere in spite of stringy hair)
(Or even just a bit bowed at the knee)
(If she can show a faultless personality)

Why are certain girls offered certain things
Like sable coats and wedding rings?
By men who wear their spats right?
(That's right!)

(So don'tcha say "I'm smart and have the kindest heart"
(Or "what a wonderful sister I'd be")
Just tell me how you like my
Mercer> [bad word] !
(Personality)

Baby, you've got the cutest
Personality!!