[announcer]
Meet Eddie, twenty-three years old.
Fed up with life and the way things are going,
he decides to rob a liquor store.
("I can't take this no more, I can't take it no more homes")
But on his way in, he has a sudden change of heart.
And suddenly, his [bad word] into play...
(" [bad word] is mine, I gotta do this.. gotta do this")

[Dr. Dre]
Alright, stop! (Huh?)
Now before you walk in the door of this liquor store
and try to get money out the drawer
You better think of the consequence (But who are you?)
I'm your [bad word] conscience

[Eminem]
That's nonsense!
Go in and gaffle the money [bad word] to one of your aunt's cribs
And borrow a [bad word] dress, and one of her blonde wigs
Tell her you need a place to stay 
You'll be safe for days if you shave your legs with Renee's razor blade

[Dr. Dre]
Yeah but if it all goes through like it's supposed to
The whole neighborhood knows you and they'll expose you
Think about it before you walk in the door first
Look at the store clerk, she's older than George Burns

[Eminem]
 [bad word] that! Do that [bad word] #33; Shoot that [bad word] #33;
Can you afford to blow this [bad word]  Are you that rich?
Why you give a [bad word] if she dies? Are you that [bad word] 
Do you really think she gives a [bad word] if you have kids?

[Dr. Dre]
Man, don't do it, it's not worth it to risk it! (You're right!)
Not over this [bad word] (Stop!) Drop the biscuit (I will!)
Don't even listen to Slim yo, he's bad for you
(You know what Dre? I don't like your attitude..)

[sound of static]

("It's alright c'mon, [bad word] in here for a minute")
("Mmm, I don't know!")
("Look baby..")
 [bad word] #33;")
("Yo, it's gonna be alright, right?")
("Well OK..")

[announcer]
Meet Stan, twenty-one years old. ("Give me a kiss!")
After meeting a young girl at a rave party,
things start getting hot and heavy in an upstairs bedroom.
Once again, his [bad word] into play... (" [bad word] #33;")

[Eminem]
Now listen to me, while you're kissin her cheek
and smearin her lipstick, I slipped this in her drink
Now all you gotta do is nibble on this little [bad word] #39;s earlobe..
(Yo! This girl's only fifteen years old
You shouldn't take advantage of her, that's not fair)
Yo, look at her bush.. does it got hair? (Uh huh!)
 [bad word] this [bad word] right here on the spot bare
Til she passes out and she forgot how she got there
(Man, ain't you ever seen that one movie _Kids_?)
No, but I seen the porno with SunDoobiest!
 [bad word]  you wanna get hauled off to jail?)
Man [bad word] that, hit that [bad word] raw dawg and bail..

[sound of static]
[pickup idling, radio playing]

[announcer]
Meet Grady, a twenty-nine year old [bad word] worker.
 [bad word] home from a hard day's work,
he walks in the door of his trailer park home
to find his wife in bed with another man.
("WHAT THE [bad word] !?!")
("Grady!!")

[Dr. Dre]
Alright calm down, relax, start breathin..

[Eminem]
 [bad word] that [bad word]  you just caught this [bad word] cheatin
While you at work she's with some dude tryin to get off?!
 [bad word] slittin her throat, CUT THIS [bad word] #39;S HEAD OFF!!!

[Dr. Dre]
Wait! What if there's an explanation for this [bad word] 
(What? She tripped? Fell? Landed on his [bad word] !)
Alright Shady, maybe he's right Grady
But think about the baby before you get all crazy

[Eminem]
Okay! Thought about it, still wanna stab her?
Grab her by the throat, get your daughter and kidnap her?
That's what I did, be smart, don't be a [bad word] 
You gonna take advice from somebody who slapped DEE BARNES??!

[Dr. Dre]
What'chu say?