Bell door on [bad word] on in
Floyd observes my hairy chin
Sit down chair don't be afraid
Steamed hot towel on my face

I was shaved
I was shaved
I was shaved

Barney ties me to the chair
I can't see I'm really scared
Floyd breathes hard 
I hear a zip
Pee pee pressed against my lips

I was shamed
I was shamed
I was shamed

I sense others in the room
Opie, Aunt Bea, I presume
They take turns and cut me up
I died smothered in Andy's butt

I was shaved
I was shaved
I was shaved